The Little Things

The little things that seem

so insignificant are very

important and of great value.

For its the little things that

causes our heart to stray from the path of life.

It is the little things that we

take for granted that causes us

to lose focus of the true meaning of life.

The little things like a smile

and the joy that it brings to others.

Yes just a single act of kindness

can change the course of someone’s life.

Let us begin today to appreciate the little things.

I AM...

I am ...
A woman
With a full heart, hidden
Somewhere in an empty room ...
With eyes not quite of autumn's gold, and yet
Neither all of summer's green;
I wonder ...If love is a tale made for children
--A granting of sweet dreams in their innocence
--A honey-coating to help their throats
Choke down the bitter draught ...
I hear ...
A voice that whispers warnings, half-formed,
Bodiless as hope, until I swear I cannot draw
Another breath unless this spectre be unmasked,
His lies mangled ‘neath my righteous tread;
I see ...
A woman, proud, uncompromising,
Diaphanous as air -- less, even, than the tears
That fall in desolation about her weary feet,
Salt poison pooled upon the withered ground ...
I want ...
A measure of quietude, a certain silence,
The echo of alone which heals me of dreaming,
The nothing that stills the wanting,
The numb, the cold that laughs at pain;
I amA woman,hidden ...
I pretend ...
That I can live forever
-- that Time
Has no puissance but that which I afford Him
--And so, I can wait, I can be happy tomorrow,
Sleep is for the dead; but its ghosts haunt my waking
...I feel ...
Too much -- too deeply to be directionless,
Too real for imagining, and yet the familiar eyes
Hold nothing of recognition --
only my reflection --
A meeting of shadows in sunlit glass;
I touch ...
The downy wings of hope, in wonder,
In reverence, in need, in hunger;
Alas, it burns my fingers as a flame,
A sacrilege, self-defined ...
I worry ...
That I am alone; that in my longingI have forsaken all
-- but oh, what reward,
What smile divine should light the path to freedom
--And how can I but heed the siren's call?
I cry ...
For having too much, for fear of bursting,
And then, when by the pouring of my soul
I lie, a vessel emptied, I cry again
For what was had, and lost;
I am
A woman,empty ...
I understand
That life is what you make it,
That sometimes, the coat of many colors
That marks your triumphs brightly, blends only
To loneliest of grey
...I say
That we are made by life, shaped,
Broken, perhaps
-- unmade and voided
--But always, the core of us remains, waiting
With only faith, with trust, to be reborn;
I dream..
Of bluest waters, reaching
With unnatural hands toward the faded sky,
Of dolphins that wander in seas without limits,
Carrying me water-breathing past corals and clouds ...
I try ...
To lead by example, knowing
That merely the telling holds no power;
A gift of giving is merely a day, while
A gift of knowing spans forever;
I hope ...
That my darkness holds you gently,
That pain is halved by sharing, that feeling
Wields nothing past the words it summons,
Except that it touch you with only healing
...I am
A woman,
only.

The Phone Call

The call that comes in darkest sleep,

Awakens with a fright;

For 2 am, the silence breaks

The peaceful calm of night.

When only moments earlier,

I dreamt of visions fair;

Of light and love and happiness;

... Till ringing filled the air.

It beckoned me from deepest sleep,

And drew me from my daze;

I shook my head to clear my mind,

Findfocus through this haze.

"How long has this been ringing?"

As I reach to find the light;

I steal a glance toward the clock,

And now my heart takes flight!

'Tis many hours before the dawn,

Yet all should be in bed;

My loved ones faces fill the night;

... My heart is filled with dread.

I struggle for composure as

I reach to grab the phone;

My stomach churns, my heart contracts;

"Are all my friends at home?"

I stumble as I grasp the handle,

Stifle silent screams;

"Oh God ... please let this phone call

Be a part of just a dream!

"My heart is racing, mind's a whirl,

Receiver's made of lead;

"Oh, how can this be happening!"

"Who's on the other end?!"

Just seconds pass and yet I find

It's been eternity;

I raise the phone to panicked ear;

"Oh please ... don't be for me!"

Drifting

I sometimes find I'm drifting
Through this life without effect;
I often wonder if I'm truly
Worth what I've been blessed.
I search through days that have been hard,
To try to understand,
The many trials that I have known,
The life that I have had.
You see me in my daily grind,
So confident and strong;
Yet when I am alone, I question
Just where I belong.
I often try too hard I find,
To analyze and guess,
To scrutinize, investigate
My life I will confess.
For somewhere deeper,
there must be
Some meaning to this life,
Some way to make a difference,
Give a reason for this strife.
Is there some hidden meaning?
Some agenda to be found?
A greater purpose waiting
If I care to hang around?
It teases and it taunts me,
Always slightly out of sight;
A hazy vision out of reach,
Where darkness hides the light.
I struggle to bring clarity
To what awaits me there,
And yet this weak illusion
Always fades before my stare.
It seems the harder that I try,
To focus through the haze,
Just serves to add more questions,
Through my endless, tired gaze.
Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,
To understand it all,
For can we ever truly know
Just what we have in store?
Each incident, each moment passed,
Just adds upon the next,
But in the end, will I find truth ...
Or will I be perplexed?
Perhaps I make it harder
Than it has to be sometimes,
But will my searching bring to me
My meaning over time?
Or will it leave me broken,
And confused as I feel now,
While questions bring no solitude,
To this, my wrinkled brow.

Small Pain in My Chest

The soldier boy was sitting calmly underneath that tree.

As I approached it, I could see him beckoning to me.

The battle had been long and hard and lasted through the night

And scores of figures on the ground lay still by morning's light.

"I wonder if you'd help me, sir", he smiled as best he could."

A sip of water on this morn would surely do me good.

We fought all day and fought all night with scarcely any rest -

A sip of water for I have a small pain in my chest."

As I looked at him, I could see the large stain on his shirt

All reddish-brown from his warm blood mixed in with Asian dirt.

"Not much", said he. "I count myself more lucky than the rest.

They're all gone while I just have a small pain in my chest."

"Must be fatigue", he weakly smiled. "I must be getting old.

I see the sun is shining bright and yet I'm feeling cold.

We climbed the hill, two hundred strong,

but as we cleared the crest,

The night exploded and I felt this small pain in my chest."

"I looked around to get some aid - the only things I found

Were big, deep craters in the earth - bodies on the ground.

I kept on firing at them, sir. I tried to do my best,

But finally sat down with this small pain in my chest."

"I'm grateful, sir", he whispered, as I handed my canteen

And smiled a smile that was, I think, the brightest that I've seen.

"Seems silly that a man my size so full of vim and zest,

Could find himself defeated by a small pain in his chest."

"What would my wife be thinking of her man so strong and grown,

If she could see me sitting here, too weak to stand alone?

Could my mother have imagined, as she held me to her breast,

That I'd be sitting HERE one day with this pain in my chest?"

"Can it be getting dark so soon?" He winced up at the sun.

"It's growing dim and I thought that the day had just begun.

I think, before I travel on, I'll get a little rest ..........

And, quietly, the boy died from that small pain in his chest.

I don't recall what happened then. I think I must have cried;

I put my arms around him and I pulled him to my side

And, as I held him to me, I could feel our wounds were pressed

The large one in my heart against the small one in his chest.

Mere Words..to my best friend

I searched among the card displays,
To see if I could find,
A little something that would say
Just what was on my mind.
However there was not a one,
That captured it just right,
For no one else can understand
Just what I'd like to write.
I even find it difficult
To try to write it down,
For how do I portray to you,
The love that I have known?
I close my eyes and what I see,
Is someone I adore;
A person who is beautiful,
Right down into their soul.
Mere words cannot describe
The many qualities you show,
The love and caring nature that
You share with those who know.
Your kind and gentle temperament,
Your sweet angelic smile,
Your softly spoken sentiments,
That reach across the miles.
Your smile and laugh that sparkle with
The softness of your sighs,
The way your face lights up a room ...
That twinkle in your eye.
The loving gestures through the days,
That quickly come to mind,
For always you've a gentle word
To calm and soothe I find.
I struggle and I search to try
To find some words anew ...
And yet I cannot capture
All the things that make you you.
I shall therefore, be satisfied
That you must simply know,
Just how I feel about you,
For with words I cannot show.

The Dummy

In that forgotten part of town
Where wasted hopes and dreams abound,
A wrinkled man with life near end,
In hopes to have at least one friend,
Fashioned bits of wood and things
And made a dummy run by strings.
He sat alone for hours on end,
Conversing with his only friend
And found delight within the fact
That he controlled it's every act.
He told it how he never had
A chance, since all his luck was bad
Although he'd tried so to succeed
-The dummy nodded and agreed.
And how his journeys in romance
Had never given him a chance,
And wasn't it a crying shame
That he was always held to blame
When everyone knew, oh so well,
That life is but a living Hell,
Controlled by lust and power and greed?
The dummy nodded and agreed.
With patience that would rival saints,
That dummy sat through all complaints
And, with each little expert tug,
He'd droop his head or bow or shrug
And give some comfort to the man
Who held his lifelines in his hand
And helped to fill a lonely need
When he just nodded and agreed.
Senility increased with time
As did the old man's phantomime,
And feverish fingers pulled with glee
The dummy's dance of misery.
They never left each other's side
Until the day both stopped and died.
We found them lying,
hand in hand,
The dummy - and his wooden friend.

Prerogative

The pain was to real for you to see,
The monster craving innocence,
That was hiding inside of me.

Temptations were castrated at the door,
Excuses brought to my attention,
Selfishness was no more,
And I was living in my own created dimension?

Of all the things I believed,
Lies were your escape from reality,
Exaggeration is my only prerogative,
And death... my only solution...

To submit my own self-conscious,
To the corrupted scribbles of hell we call home,
To be scattered surreptitiously in circles,
Able to call your temple my own.

Trying to do something,
But lacking the intelligence to do so,
Life is a monstrosity,
And to the satin pits of hell we are all forced to go.

Memories subsided,
Death crept silently behind my ear,
Horrific tales of journeys,
That no one has seen in years.

Breaking away all boundaries,
Escaping freedom is the key,
Hiding within your own selfish heart,
Knowing we are free, but freedom not being the need.

Cast all your fears upon me,
And I will wish them all away,
Promising you nothing,
Showing you success is not the way.

Just let me remind you the basics,
Of the rules we call our law,
Absences is a common need now,
Letting you know, everyone will fall?

No Words

Dreams of you,
Laughing, lying together,
Pointing at the constellations,
Glancing, you asked, "Do you love me?"

Growling I said, "No."
You look at me stangely,
Walking away,
Smiling, turning, smiling.

Silhouetted by sunlight,
Disappearing into Red,
Calling, crying,
"Do you love me?"

I ran and awoke screaming,
"I do not love you!"
And only the dresser mirror's eyes,
Stared, judging me,

While you were sleeping.

* The Pier *

He sits alone on a sun bleached, weathered bench,
staring at the sea as it rises and falls,
feeling the gentle sway of the timbers
in the relentless waves.
Deep wrinkles crease his face,
gnarled fingers rest on the rail.
The sea-breeze ruffles the grey tufts around his ears.

The gulls and a clumsy brown pelican
are his only companions
as another day slowly slips away.
He thinks of her, lost so many years ago,
the memory tangled in time.
His ancient face betrays his haunted mind
as a tear tracks through the wrinkles
and drops silently onto his chest.

Alone on his bench, he knows his long life
has been but a pyrrhic victory over death.

Midnight Rendezvous

I'm a nighttime rebel on a midnight rendezvous
with a charismatic boy doin' anything we wanna do
The daytime lifestyle has no variety,
so we save it for the night when the world falls asleep

We have all fallen in Love before
and reached a point in time
where we wished for something more
I will never find Love, but Love will find me

I'll catch a shooting star to see what it sees
All night long from the day that's gone
We let Love be Love
and what it may become

Early this morning when he called me
I was about as care-free as a girl could be
From this boy's charisma, and personality
I think my heart passed my brain goin' around 120

Traveling through this endless night
Everything we say tends to be all right
All I wanna do is make this boy smile
'Cuz I haven't felt this way in a long, long while

Sometimes Love lasts forever
While other times it comes to an end
But when you live for now or never
The heart is given time to mend

Until the pinnacle in the road
Where you're destined to meet, or part
So cast your worries to the golden moon
Let the moment be, now it's up to your heart

Forgive my separation from your reality
'Cuz we have an appointment with Destiny
This is my message, my message to you
From a nighttime rebel on a midnight rendezvous.

W A T E R i N G

Stand there behind me.
Put your arms 'round
and cup your hands 'neath mine.
I thought to lose a drop
was pure calamity ...
but perhaps real lasting love
is more a sifting than a dam.

The thirsting ground
receives capricious overflow
with eager rising needs.
New greening things can
grow now, watered
with the surplus
of an overflowing cup.

God surely didn't make us perfect
and dawn can brings trials
with the face of a stranger.
But we do grow.
Despite the pain, we can reach
outward and beautifully blossom
in reflection of His splendor.

So hold me close
and with hands growing together.
we'll watch the new growth
burgeon and expand
below as the cascades
of "plenty"
slake our ground.

Sugarless

He looks me up and down, I can feel his eyes
I start to undress as he sits staring at me
I smile softly at him as I continue
I think it's funny how he thinks I am cute
He kisses me like he likes the taste
yet, it's all so sugarless, how can he like it?
I laugh to myself as I change my clothes
then when I am done I lie down beside him
and give him the sugarless taste he craves so much

Night Winds

The Sandman visits-I'm lost in sleep
The presence of you-the Night Winds keep.
Through the window they enter-and caress my flesh
The breeze so warm-so soft and fresh.
I lay in silence-and hear your breath
While burdens of Day-approaches Death.
I feel you so near-a smile awakes
The Loneliness existing-your presence takes.
The Wind blows slowly-across my face
I refuse the covers-to feel your embrace.
The Night Winds lead me-I anxiously await
To enter the world-of Love and Fate.
You take me there-I feel your soul
The Night Winds come-to make me whole.
Just you and I-in our world of dreams
With laughter and comfort-as starlight beams.
I walk with you-inside your pace
As roses bloom-and Angel's race.
The Night Winds bring-you to my Heart
The Night Winds promise-we'll never part.

An Ageless Love

I feel as though their love is ageless
that they might have been lovers
throughout the centuries
no...not Anthony & Cleopatra
not Romeo & Juliet

Just ordinary folks whose heartstrings
were gently pulled while listening to
primitive drums, wandering minstrels,
great operas performed live in the
finest halls of Old Europe!!!

They might have broken fresh bread together,
steaming fragrance, further kindling the
flames of Love
They could have fed each other morsels
of delectable cheese and sipped on wine
from a shared glass

One could not love someone else...this profoundly
in one lifetime
I know for sure that their love is an ageless love
that will continue voyaging on...
in search of future centuries.